Confessions of a Bad Mommy

Most moms, especially working moms, tend to feel like they need to be perfect, do everything right, be everything to everybody and look good doing it. But, trying to keep up a charade like that is bound to drive a woman insane. After 5 and almost 1/2 months, I have learned that it’s okay to suck once in a while. My baby is healthy and happy, he is thriving and he is loved. I am not perfect. And that’s okay.

Here are some examples:

  • I know that half a package of Peeps and 3 cups of coffee does not equal a nutritious breakfast for a nursing mother. But, that’s what I ate for breakfast last week – twice.
  • When you are driving home and baby starts crying with about 10 minutes to go, you have two options. A.) Pull over and see what’s up. B.) Turn on the radio and try to get home as fast as possible. Guess which one I would probably pick?
  • I stopped to snap a picture of this*:
    Do not try this at home, folks.

  • If Charlie has a soiled diaper and it’s close to the time that Tristan gets home from work, I will try to wait it out 99% of the time. Then, when Daddy walks in, gives Charlie his hello kisses and he starts to fuss, I say “Oh weird, maybe he just filled his diaper.” And, Daddy does the clean up. (Secret’s out now.)
  • I wear yoga pants to pick up my child from daycare, at least 3 times a week. Hey, at least I shower.
  • I track down my iPhone before sitting down to breastfeed so I can play on it, every time. Even if he is screeching. Sorry – I have a short attention span…15-20 minutes of staring at a wall and rocking doesn’t work for me. I really hope that thing doesn’t shoot out cancer rays, because if so I’m the worst mom in history.
  • When Charlie was a little younger, I used to let him win the battle over the hat. He hated things on his head, so I opted for no-hat baby  over screaming, inconsolable baby. Considering he was born in the middle of a cold, Maine winter, this was probably a shitty thing to do but it seemed essential at the time.
  • Although I am perfectly capable of breastfeeding, we’ve begun supplementing with formula prior to the suggested 6-months-exclusive-breastfeeding recommendation. Sorry, but, this Mama needs her wine so she doesn’t go nuts. And I’d rather give him Similac than Pinot Grigio, ok?
  • When we took Charlie to his last Pediatrician appointment, I suddenly realized he hadn’t had a bath in days. I say ‘days’, because I couldn’t even remember his last bath enough to count the exact number of days. He smelled fine, but the build up behind his ears gave him away. I scrubbed them a bit with a baby wipe before going into the exam room in hopes that they wouldn’t notice.

There you have it. With the exception of the photo incident (which I’ve written a disclaimer for at the bottom), none of these items really have the ability to seriously damage my child. The above are things that I’m not proud of, but when you are exhausted, stressed out, over-worked, dealing with a teething infant who refuses to nap and you’re maybe feeling under-appreciated, you do what you have to do to get through the day.

And being imperfect is okay.

* Charlie has been doing this lately, and YES, we now use the straps every time. In this shot, he had gone from fast asleep to this position without making a sound. I looked over and he was just dangling from the swaying swing… I made sure he wasn’t going to fall before snapping the pic. I’m not THAT bad of a mommy. 😉

Disclaimer: No babies were hurt in the writing of this blog.

4 thoughts on “Confessions of a Bad Mommy

Leave a Reply